Look that I have heard strange things in the few years that I have been working as a pediatric nurse (and see that I have read strange things in various Internet forums), but the question that a mother asked me a while ago about the “bad habit” of the Kids left me quite surprised.
He was just dressing his newborn baby when he asked me about taking him in his arms or not picking him up, you know, so they don't get too used up as it seems to be, apparently, in many hospitals and in many houses (grandmothers, who they took what they wanted and more and their daughters are told not to take their babies), when he asked me when would I have to stop taking the baby in my arms.
As I did not understand the question very well, because I did not know very well what he meant (I was about to answer that "if it weighs too much, if it is 8 years old, ..."), I asked him to extend the question a little more to know What was your real concern. Then he explained to me that In the hospital where one of the nurses went to give birth, he told her he could take the baby until three months, because from then on they got used to the arms.
In other words, babies can be taken as much as you want because they don't “get used to it,” but if they already have three months they don't, because then they do get used to it (and badly).
I was perplexed because it sounded like that of “give a teta on demand, but never before three hours”, that that demand has nothing, because the advice came to be a “quiet, take your baby as much as you need, but After three months, stop doing it, which is bad. ”
I was glad for the first part, because at least this mother was told that she could take her baby as much as she wanted, that there are other mothers who are scolded if they have a lot of arms in their baby a few hours old (like if the baby were from the nurses!), but I did not like the second part, because it is a penalty that a mother (and consequently the father, who will surely do the same), has marked on the calendar the day on which her son turns three months to, from that day, take your child much less avoiding the contact that has done so well until that date.
Children have to have all the paternal and maternal contact they want and need because To learn to live for themselves you must first learn to live with us. It is very difficult and very hard to learn alone and harder and harder is if you have three months and the only thing they offer you is a reduced visual field: the ceiling if you are lying down and what your eyes perceive if you are in a hammock.
And not only that, but it is very hard to have three months, cry because you need something (you need to eat, drink, you have heat, cold or just want some human warmth) and see that you do not receive it (I talk about love and human warmth) because someone thinks it can be harmful to you.
And all this talking about the baby, because if I focus on the parents, then more of the same. It must be very hard to have a baby of three months, plump, beautiful, with a smooth and perfect skin and an annoying weight (they still weigh a little) and not being able to give you the pleasure of carrying it all day long, sleeping in your arms, being walked or, simply, seeing the world.
I don't know if you've ever heard this theory about the "bad habit" of babies, but if so, let me know, please. Maybe it's even spreading ...
