We live in an absolutely hypocritical world when it comes to motherhood and fatherhood. I have noticed him as a father and I have noticed him when he saw other couples find themselves in absolute joy with their relatives and surroundings during pregnancy and take a slap in reality once the baby is born when, after the first few days, everyone disappears Y they ask you to make your children disappear.
It is as if there is a global collusion dedicated to making young couples believe that having a baby is the most beautiful and wonderful thing they can aspire to, because babies are completely precious and hardly change your vital rhythm and then, being parents, forget about you because "now it's your business", to look for the next couple and convince her of the same.
Maybe that's why Holly brockwell, 30 years, has passed a real odyssey for four long years to finally fulfill your dream of not having children.
The hypocrisy of pushing you to have children
It is not the first time I talk about it. Already in February I commented because it seemed very sad that the entire society is responsible for convince people without children to have them, then ask you to forget that they exist and give them to the system to be the one who is responsible for educating and shaping them: already at four months the end is over, and to work. Then you have to leave it with the grandparents or in a nursery, and "you are still yourself, you have to continue chasing your dreams and developing professionally." Oh, and do not forget to be a superwoman (a great mother, wife, with the perfect house, great woman, feminist, fighter and really everything that a woman can aspire to).
It is totally contradictory and that is why many mothers and many fathers feel completely lost. Lost and exhausted. They have children because it is what is expected of them, and perhaps also because they want to, and when they are already parents and realize that this baby is not at all coupled to the functioning of this society, when they see that we have been doing things the same very bad for a long time, because we have distanced ourselves so much from our essence that not even babies can keep up with usThen they try to slow down a little, to give themselves room to help their baby grow with a little common sense, and then they say no, that nothing, that the first thing is them and their profession and that the baby is already They will handle if that others. And as soon as they can "go for the little brother, they won't be so selfish as to have nothing but one."
Four years to get your dream of being sterile
Thus we come to the story of Holly brockwell, a woman who has been clear, all her life, that I didn't want to be a mother. His determination was such that his condition when looking for a partner was that the boy did not want to have children either. Thus, at 26, fully convinced of his decision, he went to his GP to request a sterilization intervention. I didn't need to be fertile because I wasn't going to gestate any baby, so I wanted to be able to avoid any risk of pregnancy by the most reliable way.
However, they refused to consider it too young to think about doing something like that. She claimed that it is legal to be a mother at 16, and that as a result it had been 10 years since she could have been without even having the intention. And that in those 10 years he had had a lot of time to think about it and make a conscious and mature decision. And not with those.
Since then he kept fighting to be able to do with her body what she wanted, without understanding that an adult woman could not decide on her life and her body, as if the fertile wombs of women were owned by the state until they stop gestating babies.
But not everything came from the world of healthcare professionals. She has never hidden her decision. Nor has he been explaining it because yes, in the plan "Hello, I do not know your name but I would like you to know that I want to be sterile", but when someone asked him about motherhood, or about plans to have children, he responded with his opinion and with his decision, in the same way that someone could say "well, we are going to try to be parents now" or "we are going to wait a few years and then we will start with it".
And as you can imagine, he heard everything: "You will change your mind one day", "Your biological clock will come into operation and you will regret it", "You will meet the man of your dreams and want to have his own children ...", and even worse things , like "You are selfish," "You are naive ... you will die alone ... what is the purpose then of doing something like that?", "It is a waste to have a perfect uterus to be a mother, an insult to all people who cannot have children "," If you do not want to have babies, you should not have sex "," You are broken inside ... You are unable to love ... You are a person who only seeks to have sex without consequences ... Thank God there are not many people like you "or" How can you deny your parents the grandchildren you owe them? How can you be so ungrateful to them that they did have you? "
And finally, he got it
At 30, after four years of being criticized, demonized and verbally attacked for free to express her desire not to be a mother, Holly has achieved her purpose in an intervention of less than an hour at St. Thomas Hospital in London . The side effects are pain and nausea, but he is aware and that will allow him, for example, to stop having a pregnancy test at home just in case he had any delay in his period.
Does he hate children?
That also tells many people, that the safest thing is that you do not want to have children because he hates children. but no, it is not that. He has nieces and goes out of their way, loves to spend time together. He just doesn't see the need to have that at home, and he doesn't feel it has to be that way.
As explained in the Daily Mail, many women are mothers because they do not even stop to think about whether or not they want to have children, or whether or not they feel the need to have them. Because it is not really something that one has to sit down to think "to see if I want to have children or not," because normally this is always decided. At best, you think about the best moment, if "now" or "later."
And because, as he says, more than thinking, you have to feel that you love them. Feel that you want to be a mother, that you want to give birth and dedicate the rest of your life to take care of them, to have that responsibility, to give them and receive love, and to increase your level of responsibilities. And her never felt.
His mother has always supported him
When his mother knew it was his decision he confessed that she, as a young man, felt the same. She didn't want to have children, she didn't feel any need for it, but she never thought about having surgery because when she met her husband, she knew she would want to be a father. And so he chose to have the two daughters he had. Five years after having the second, Holly, the father committed suicide and remained alone, with the two girls, taking care of them and loving them like their mother, but probably with the feeling of being carrying the life that others expected him to lead and not the one she would have decided to live.
That's why she, Holly, did not give his arm to twist. He says that almost everyone who finds out what he has done tells him that he is crazy, that a day will come when he will regret it and then he will not be able to do anything. But she is clear, that will not happen.
And if it happened, what? Who is who to decide for her? When do we stop being free to live as we want and make the decisions we consider best? Isn't it better for a woman not to be a mother if she feels she doesn't want to be, to live motherhood as if it were a prison?
