With the scarce conciliation that we have parents today, in most families, grandparents are a great help in caring for children. But where is the limit between help and abuse? In the case of a separate father who systematically went to the child's grandparents for care, it has been justice that has been pronounced.
A judge of the Provincial Court of A Coruña he has taken custody of his son for completely delegating their care to grandparents.
The parents were separated and shared custody of their child equally. But two years after the divorce, the mother requested to withdraw custody of her ex-husband for "breaching her parental responsibilities", and ended up being granted exclusively to her.
The sentence details the reasons:
"The inattention of the father in the care of his son, which replace paternal grandparents, constitutes an essential alteration of the circumstances that were taken into account when joint custody was adopted. The parental functions that correspond to the father they are of obligatory fulfillment, not being able to exonerate themselves for considering that the minor is well taken care of by the grandparents ".
In addition, a new visitation regime for the father was established two days a week and two weekends a month, as well as the distribution of vacation days between the two.
In Babies and more Grandparents who care for their grandchildren live longerGrandfather Slave Syndrome
The so-called slave grandfather syndrome is one of the evils of our time. Grandparents enjoy taking care of their grandchildren, but not when they become a systematic obligation with which they end up overwhelmed, much less when used to avoid parental responsibilities, as seems to be the case.
As the judge explains in the text of the sentence:
"One thing is that in specific cases you may be forced to ask the child's grandparents for help for your care, but not that these are the ones who take care and take care of your grandson directly, since the functions that correspond to the father are of obligatory fulfillment without being able to exonerate themselves of their obligations for considering that the minor is well taken care of by the grandparents, which is not in doubt, but it is he who as father must fulfill obligations".
Grandparents are a help, but we should not put them in a situation that exceeds their physical and psychological abilities, and that can have a high cost for them.
Many grandparents neglect their activities and sometimes even give up their own vacations to attend to their grandchildren on strenuous days.
And of course, it is one thing to ask grandparents for help and another delegate to them the care of children.
In Babies and more Slave grandfather syndrome: grandparents overwhelmed by the care of grandchildren
